Love Shy: Or Just Extreme Shyness Focused On One Aspect?

It is hard for most people to imagine what it is like to be love shy.  It is hard for them to imagine what it is like to cringe and internally “collapse” when confronted or in the midst of a woman. For some however, it is a daily burden, and at times a seemingly incurable behavior that impedes and impolitely interrupts our life.

It is, however, my opinion and belief that love shyness is a variable branch of “regular” shyness.  Albeit a sometimes more drastic and life affecting form, it still holds the characteristic of shyness.  A person afraid of insects doesn’t necessarily dislike and avoid all insects, maybe just a certain type that is particularly scary or intimidating to them. Yet one could argue that those afraid of an insect, whether it be a grasshopper or an ant, would all have similar root cause.

The same can be said of those who are shy and those who are love shy. Working on those root causes is what will help one with shyness or love shyness.

Sure maybe you have a medical condition, or a mental condition. Maybe you are irreversibly love shy for the rest of your life! Maybe so.  But don’t you think you owe it to yourself – your future self to be exact, the one who will look back and wonder why you didn’t try to resolve your love shy tendencies – to try and fix it now?

I think so.  We already agreed that shyness and love shyness can not be too far apart when it comes to root causes. I propose to you to work on your love shyness the same way a person would work on their “normal” shyness.  Get some books on how to be confident, on how to be more outgoing and spontaneous, and see what happens.

The worst that could happen is you spend a few months working on safe and natural ways to help your self.  Self improvement at its best, lessons and technique started, preformed and finished by the person who knows you best, yourself, techniques that are designed to take a shy person to a whole new level.

Sounds better than jumping straight into medication doesn’t it? And it sounds a billion times better than giving up and “letting” yourself be love shy for the rest of your life.

Also I want to make one more argument, this is something that is sometimes discouraged or sometimes thought of as “giving up”, but I can tell you from experience that it is something to be encouraged and is the exact opposite of giving up.

What is it? It is about you deciding what you like and don’t like about your love shy traits. Or normal shyness or social anxiety or social phobia.  It doesnt matter what the label is, what matters is that there are no doubt aspects of your particular shyness that you like. Or even love. Then there are the parts you dislike and wish to banish to the deepest recesses of hell!

I put forth the idea to not throw out those good traits with the bad.  First of all what this does is it lightens the load. Instead of thinking you need to completely remove every one of your love shy traits you only need to think and work on the ones that bother you.  That would make it easier wouldn’t it?

Maybe, to you, being a little on guard when talking to women for the first time is something you wish to keep, if so, then keep it.  The reason I use that example is because it is one of the traits I kept. When people first meet me, even now after I have made HUGE advancements with my shyness, people still refer to me as “shy”. But I dont care, I like it.  It lets me meet a person or woman without the blinders and illusions put in place by talking.  I can see how they act, how they treat people and how they think.  Then I can make the decision of whether or not to talk to them.

Accepting some of your love shy traits, secondly, allows you to be yourself.  It allows you to keep what are probably admirable or attractive traits. You never know what people really like you for, maybe your going red or the way you cant keep eye contact for a long length of time is something that makes you … you.